Forgiveness is a non-negotiable in the life of a Christian. On one hand, we must be forgiven for the offenses we commit. On the other hand, we must forgive those who commit offenses against us.
There are far too many texts in the Bible to mention on this subject, even if we limit them to Jesus own words. However, here are a couple of key passages from the mouth of Jesus:
“Therefore, if you are offering your gift at the altar and there remember that your brother or sister has something against you, leave your gift there in front of the altar. First go and be reconciled to them; then come and offer your gift.” – Matthew 5:23-24
“For if you forgive other people when they sin against you, your heavenly Father will also forgive you. But if you do not forgive others their sins, your Father will not forgive your sins.” – Matthew 6:14-15
“And when you stand praying, if you hold anything against anyone, forgive them, so that your Father in heaven may forgive you your sins.” – Mark 11:25-26
“Do not judge, and you will not be judged. Do not condemn, and you will not be condemned. Forgive, and you will be forgiven. Give, and it will be given to you. A good measure, pressed down, shaken together and running over, will be poured into your lap. For with the measure you use, it will be measured to you.” – Luke 6:37-38
We cannot ignore these powerful commands or treat them as optional and still be followers of Jesus. That means we have to come to terms with the unforgiveness in our lives any time it appears.
In my experience, when people hold onto unforgiveness it’s usually because they don’t understand what forgiveness is or they have never received it themselves. Here are some examples:
1. People mistakenly believe forgiveness says what was done against us is “OK.”
2. People wrongly believe that forgiving someone means getting into the position where they are free to hurt us again.
3. People have only received a poor substitute for forgiveness, like when someone makes it conditional or temporary.
4. People incorrectly believe that if they truly forgive they will forget what happened.
All of these (and many more like them) notions are wrong and if they get mixed up in our understanding of forgiveness we end up poisoning this beautiful gift God offers us.
Instead, forgiveness is about allowing God’s forgiving love and peace for us to bring us to the place where we can be whole and free. It is about His supernatural power vindicating us, making clear to us and to others that we were wronged. It is about protecting us from the offender in such a way that we do not become like them. It is about receiving the unconditional acceptance and love of God in such a way that we are able to offer a portion of it to others. Finally, it is about remembering that offense as it truly is, but releasing our right to take revenge for it because God has allowed us to be free from it. In that regard it is about a supernatural victory we gain from God that brings us peace and right relationship with Him and, at least on our part, with others.
What role has forgiveness played in your life?
What areas do you need to grow in to better resemble Jesus?
To me forgiveness is rich. It is like a bandaid on the inside of your heart that only God can apply. He shows me what I need to release to him and guides me to know the words to speak to the person I have offended. God has given me the ability to forgive and has since I was little. But only his part in the transaction- forgiveness, brings true peace and rest for my soul. I also like to think of God's forgiveness like my sin being written in the sand on the beach- me asking forgiveness and the waves rushing in and washing them away, never to be recalled again.
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